The hard drive which is my life has been stuck in a loop of some sort and I’m in desperate need of a reset. Seriously. If I am to grab hold of my purpose, then I have to let go of other things that have become distractions.

Even as I write this post, my thoughts are jumbled, but they center around four points.

1. Lent and Fasting
2. My Growing Appetite
3. Moving Toward
4. Accountability

Lent and Fasting
As I considered what to give up this year for Lent, two things came to mind. Sugar and social media. Frankly, I rationalized why those were bad ideas. I couldn’t give up social media because it’s tied into what I do for a living. That would be ridiculous. And sugar? Far too difficult to maintain. So I decided to give up dessert. My “fast” only lasted for a few days, maybe a couple of weeks at most.

Surely Jesus would understand.

My Growing Appetite
I’m speaking both physically and metaphorically. The physical part really needs no explanation. Look as far as my waistline and you’ll see the results of increased food intake. When I look in the mirror, I no longer see the skinny high school girl, nor the young woman to whom people often commented, “You should be a model.”  Sadly, I’m on the wrong side of the age/metabolism/weight equation but my behavior hasn’t changed.

The metaphorical part is about my appetite for connectivity, including social media interaction. My appetite is fiercely out of proportion with my ability to maintain the intake. (Maybe you know what I mean.) How many times during a day (during a minute) do I really need to check email? Why do I feel the need to read what everyone‘s doing on Facebook? In the grand scheme of things, what difference does it make if I interact with thousands of people (or even a hundred) on Twitter? And just because I CAN do something, may not mean that I SHOULD be doing it.

My appetite is out of whack.

Moving Toward
Over the last few months, God has been moving me towards writing. Again. (I’m such a slow learner!) I know it as surely as I know my name is Cheryl Smith. I am to write the story of His faithfulness in my life so it can be an encouragement for others who are going through difficult times. And I’m making progress.

But the writing is slow. And I get distracted. Easily. And it’s tough writing about the hard places of life.

So I’ve wrestled a lot with God. (Please tell me you do this too.) Wanting to obey Him, within the depths of my heart. Wanting to be faithful as He has been faithful. When it comes right down to it, however, I’m still walking according to my own will. Flesh. I’ve gotten really good at rationalizing and making excuses. And spending my time connecting with others and teaching them how to connect with others, instead of doing what I know is my calling.

“The good is the enemy of the best.”

Accountability
On Monday this week I participated in my first Leadership Huddle phone call. At the invitation of John Chandler of the Spence Network, I’ll be engaging with leaders throughout Virginia Baptist life on a regular basis. The “huddle” is for an hour a week (give or take for holidays), for the next twelve weeks.

During the first call we talked about the temptation of Jesus in the wilderness and which of the three temptations we might be experiencing. (My temptation was appetite.) John offered “a prescription” to help me address that area of temptation. Any guesses? Fasting.

Thankfully, though I tried to ignore God’s invitation to sacrifice something during Lent, He gave me another chance to obey. Not because He wants obedience. Rather, He wants to refine the attitudes and actions within me that keep me from His plan and purpose in my life. His best for me. Next week I’m to give an account for how I’m doing with my prescription.

It’s high challenge.

So What?
Between now and Easter I’m hitting the reset button.

Other than what is necessary for my commitment as Welcome Editor for High Calling Blogs (and a presentation on social media next week for the Bluefield Chamber), I’m going to fast from my use of social media to help me reset my perspective on connectivity. I’m also giving up sugar and carbs, to help me reset my perspective on food.

My prayer is that I will use the extra time and energy to write more of that story about God’s faithfulness in my life.

Dear Lord, My spirit is willing but my flesh is weak. Emmanuel, be with me. Empower me through your Holy Spirit.

What About You?

• Do you ever feel like life needs a reset button?
  
• What have you moved away from, in order to move towards?
  
• How has accountability played a role in realizing God’s purpose for your life?

I’d love to hear your answers in the form of a comment.

Creative Commons photo on Flickr by krunkwerke.