Tonight I’m headed back to the Blue Ridge Regional Jail to meet with a small group of woman inmates. Two other women and I will be facilitating a session on communication, based on Biblical principles.

I knew it would be a long week, so I set aside several hours this afternoon to review the material (I’ve participated in this particular session several times), prepare my heart, and pray.

However, sometimes the most spiritual thing you can do is listen to your body, and rest. I took some Aleeve and a nap, and woke up refreshed, but feeling pressed for time. Instead of doing the logical thing, getting out the material and making notes, I opened my journal and began to write.

…”I’m not feeling very prepared.

“Lord, what can I share about communication? What truths have I learned? What do You say about communication? What do others say?”

I began to write. God brought to mind the story of the woman at the well. I turned to John 4 in my Bible, read, then wrote pages of notes. In this passage, Jesus was after intimacy. The woman was more interested in putting up walls. Jesus persisted. He asked questions. Listened. Saw her fear, her need and her heart.

Every single thing I wrote in my journal dovetailed beautifully with sections 9-13 that I’ve been asked to facilitate. Everything.

I’m not going into the jail tonight as an expert on communication. I’m going as a woman who said yes, who’s put up my own share of walls, but thankfully, found Jesus to be persistent.

And I’m counting on God to show up because He alone is faithful.

Would you pray?
Would you pray that the three of us leading will be effective and in unity? That we’ll be sensitive to the leading of the Holy Spirit? Would you pray for the 3-10 women involved in Interfaith Outreach Association’s Progressive Release Program? That God will tangibly reveal truth to each of us tonight, and in the days to come? Pray for each of the women to be encouraged this week and to be able to share what they’ve learned with someone else in the coming week.

What about you?
When have you said “yes” to God and felt like you weren’t at all prepared, only to discover God was the One equipping?

Creative Commons photo on Flickr by 710928003.

[lcf] is Lynchburg Christian Fellowship, a 2-year old church plant that meets in Schewel Hall on the campus of Lynchburg College. Our family just started attending this fall.

There was no teaching/sermon time, only worship and prayer. The folks in the band rocked it out yesterday, and capably brought us into the Presence of God. It was powerful! These guys are truly anointed for worship leadership.

And can I just say, “they are young! And they play loudly!” :) But none of that matters when you’re in unity with other believers and you’re worshiping God.

After we sang a few opening songs, we were asked to find a partner and pray together. Right there in the middle of church. Who ever heard of such things? No 8 week class to learn how first, just get together and pray. I believe God was at work mightily during that time.

Peter and I prayed together. He began by asking me how he could pray for me. His prayer was a thing of beauty, spoken from his heart to God’s. Husbands, ask your wives this question. (My blogging friend Kim has a lot to say about that.)

After that, it was my turn to pray for Peter. (Ladies, without prompting at a church service, how often do we ask our husbands how we can pray for them?)

Following the partner prayers, we were encouraged to visit any of the prayer stations set up around the auditorium. The three normal response stations were already set up: the wooden cross with the sticky notes and markers, the community chest and the communion table.

Incidentally, since listening to Mike Breen‘s sermon on Identity and Purpose, I’m partaking of the Lord’s Supper with more significant meaning than ever before in my life.

The other response stations were specifically about prayer. We were to lay hands on the Lynchburg College t-shirt, and pray for the campus. As we touched the lcf t-shirt we were to pray for the lcf community.

The other side of the auditorium had three prayer stations. One to write ideas about how lcf can do service in our community or around the world and one was a prop from the last sermon series on rhythms and we were to put a post it note on the rhythm where we are most in need of consistency. (I know that’s only two, but I’m saving the last one…)

The band played worship music throughout the time of prayer. After I visited each of the prayer and response stations, I returned to my seat. I think it was Philip (one of the co-pastors) who encouraged us to simply listen to what God might be saying. Here’s a glimpse of what I wrote in my journal:

“Cheryl, I have spoken to the deep places of your heart today through the worship time. As you prayed for the LC Campus, I poured out my heart of love for the people here who don’t know me, and for those who are hurting and broken. As you took communion, I said ‘you are worthy.’ I poured out my blood and gave my body, freely, for you to be accepted. Cheryl, I say again, you are worthy. On the Scrabble table, you saw ‘Author.’ You heard me say this to you. You spelled out ‘Abba’ and before you returned to your seat, Philip prayed Abba aloud during his prayer.”

“Cheryl, today, you have heard my voice.”

I continue to give thanks to what God is doing through leadership, both paid staff and lay people, at [lcf].

What about you?
When have you heard God speak personally to you? What did He say?

“The way I was doing the work of God was destroying the work of God in me.”

Leaders need to have personal spiritual momentum. Above all else, when a church has “it” the most common ingredient was the leader had a broken (in a good way, humble) and sincere relationship with God. There was/is significant spiritual momentum in the life of the leader. As the leader goes spiritually, so the church goes.

Some of you, if you don’t make some changes now, you’ll be crushed under a burden that was never yours to carry.
Gen. 31: 33-34 (or 43-44)? “what can I do today about these daughters of mine…?” What can I do at this moment to make progress in the situation? Big goal, but so many people get paralyzed between the vision and the implementation.

I will do TODAY what I can do, to enable to do TOMORROW what I can’t do TODAY.

Four Things To Guard & Sustain Spiritual Momentum
1. Do something to defeat your dark side. First, you have to identify what is your dark side. What is my weakness? My dark side is: ____________________. (performance, pleasing others, or whatever – etc.) What do you do to step into faith and move ahead with God.  In your own life, whatever is buried in your dark side could be the hidden strength of your ministry, if you’ll defeat it.
2. Create artificial ministry deadlines. How long can you work on a sermon until it’s good enough? Forever. In ministry, you are never done. There’s always something else you can do. Once I’ve done XXX then I’m finished. Vacation principle: if you’re leaving by Wednesday, you can get a full week’s worth of work. It forces you to say no to what’s not important, delegate what needs to, and make decisions that you might otherwise postpone. Craig uses the coin toss approach. By the time it lands, tell me your decision. Forces us to have the courage to make a decision you would make in a couple of weeks, so you can move on and have progress.

If you aren’t creating boundaries that give you times to seek God, be with your wife and family, you’re not…(I missed the rest of this quote)

3. Delegate what someone else can do. Don’t delegate responsibilities. Instead delegate authority. Delegating responsibilities  creates followers. Delegating authority creates leaders. Leaders go where they can lead. If you take sharp leaders and give them too small boundaries, they’ll go somewhere else where they can lead.

You have to have a high tolerance for chaos. Have to give them the ability to fail. “Failure is not an option” is an unhealthy, unproductive statement. The reason we don’t delegate is pride and poor leadership. How insulting is that to God who created other people?

4. Do something only you can do. What? (For example, I’m the only one who can be a wife to Peter, a mom/step-mom to our kids.) If you continue sacrificing your marriage/your family, on the altar of ministry, you won’t stay married. The church is not your god. The church is not your identity. God to Craig, “you’ve become a full-time pastor, and a part-time follower of Christ.” If you don’t have a passion for the Word of God, and knowing him intimately, you can’t lead your ministry into true spiritual success. I started serving the Church and stopped serving the God of Church.

Following Craig’s session, there was an amazing time of worship. Craig invited folks to come to the altar to pray if they needed to regain their own spiritual momentum. It was powerful to see so many leaders on their knees, praying and seeking God.

Just might have been my favorite session.

**If you stayed for the last session, I’d love to hear what I missed.

I left after the third session because I was committed to running in a 2-mile Cross Country Partner Race with my 12 year old. Did I say committed? I think I meant, “should have been committed.” But I survived.

A lie believed as truth will affect you as truth. (Craig told the story of one of his colleagues held captive because of his wrong mindset – trapped in the closet, nothing keeping the door shut.)
Rom. 12:2

Don’t be conformed anymore to the old ways of thinking about church (from 1984, 2008. Today is a new day), but be transformed…
Churches love to settle.

Love Groeschel’s comments about functioning differently because he has a family with six kids.
Church w/150 people has to have a different mindset than a church w/80 people. We lead/manage/think/dream with past, rather than future mindset.

Five Specific Mindset Changes
1. Think differently about your church culture. How people think and behave. “Our people won’t …. blank.” Challenge, instead say, “we haven’t led our people to …. blank.” (lead by example)

Ex: Our church isn’t very evangelistic. As church leader, when is the last time you’ve had a non-believer in your home? Authentic relationship. Whenver you say, “they won’t” STOP! Ask yourself, can you do it?

2. Think differently about programming. We’re taught, do more to reach more. He’s learned the opposite is true. We can reach more by doing less.

He used to think, if we just had, “X” then we’ll be a real church. They became so busy doing stuff, that they lost their focus. Vast majority of churches today are overprogrammed, wearing people out and loosing momentum.

In order to reach people that no one is reaching you have to do things that no one else is doing. To do things no one else is doing, you can’t do what everybody else is doing. Shut down something that isn’t working.

3. Think differently about your mission (of the church). Typically it falls way too far down on the list of actual priorities, especially when it comes to staffing and volunteers. In the church world because we love Jesus and want to treat people w/love we can’t hurt feelings. Actually, we allow someone to hold back the mission of the church. We hire & recruit for the present, but we need to do it differently. 40 kids is different than 20 kids. The leader needs are different. (Law of the lid.) One of the biggest problems of the American church is we’re afraid of pain/conflict. The difference between where you are and where God wants you to be, is the painful decision you’ve been putting off.

4. Think differently about people leaving the church. We can GROW when people leave. Keeping the back door shut isn’t the best strategy. Even a person has a back door. Insecurity doesn’t attract. Security attracts. In the church world, this is who God has called us to be. Maybe you’re not meant to be here. (Reminds me of “Growth in pruning/semicircle” – lifeshapes by 3D Ministries)

5. Think differently about limitations. “We Can’t because we don’t.” leads to excuses. We CAN because we don’t. Limitations are the most fertile breeding ground for innovation. Buried w/i your greatest limitation is your greatest innovation to do what you never thought you could do.

Ex: Peter silver and gold have I none, but in the name of Jesus get up and walk. Some of you are begging God for $10 when God is saying do this other thing!

Some of you are like a 15 year old boy looking at a naked woman. Oh no he didn’t :) (I was so stunned by that phrase, I don’t remember what his point was.)

God has given us everything we need to reach those he’s called us to reach. He doesn’t have a supply problem.

Assignment
1. Find someone one or two steps ahead of you and learn how they think. Most people want to learn what they do, not how they think. Get inside his/her mind. Don’t copy the what. Know the why. Find a mentor, someone one or two steps ahead.
2. Identify one WRONG mindset and ask God to renew your mind w/Truth. Write it out, cross it out, and put the right one up on a wall where you can look at it every day.
3. Identify one painful decision you’ve been avoiding and commit to make the decision no mater what the short term pain.

Lack of margin keeps us from leading effectively. Moral margin is also important to keep us from sinning. Creative margin – time to think and pray. Time margin, Financial margin.

We don’t recruit volunteers. We release leaders. (re: they don’t hire staff people for every ministry they do.)

“Change people or change people.”

Key is vision. Help people understand the “why.”
Objects at rest tend to stay at rest.

I stopped trying to balance. (Reminds me of Marcus Buckingham: key concept of juggling isn’t grasping, it’s tossing)

• Momentum is forward motion fueled by a series of wins.
• If you have momentum and you don’t know why, you’re one stupid decision away from loosing it.
• If you don’t know why you had it to begin with, you’ll push all the wrong buttons and levers to get it.

Momentum is disruptive to the status quo.

In the church world, we say, “well, God is just blessing.” The arrogance is that, “God isn’t blessing elsewhere.” While God may indeed be blessing, this is not particularly helpful to the person asking.

While you’re praying for revival, could we just fire some lazy staff members?

3 Components of Sustained Movement

New
1. New triggers momentum.
2. Anything new by definition triggers some kind of momentum.
3. Momentum can be positive or negative. (negative event/negative momentum. 911)(negative event/positive momentum:  Chilean rescue)(positive event/positive momentum: new sports franchise)
4. Organizational momentum is often triggered by: New leadership, new direction, new product (program); short ministry cycles to restart.

Implication: do we need a new leader, new direction or new product, or some combination? The default is to say “we need a new leader,” (which is often blame).
*Momentum is never triggered by tweaking something OLD. It is triggered by introducing something NEW. (new is expensive & risky, so we default to tweaking the old instead.)

Improved
Minor improvements to something that doesn’t have momentum will never create momentum. This is a challenge for established churches. Warning: New doesn’t guarantee sustained momentum. New must be NOTICEABLE. It must be significant or it won’t have sustained momentum.

Significant improvement is expensive. You’re better shutting down 5 mediocre programs to invest in one significantly improved program. Safe doesn’t equal significant. Momentum is essential to penetrate our culture and make a difference.

WARNING: Even significant improvement has a shelf life. In the church world, we leave things on the shelf way too long. (How many versions of the iPod do we have already? In church world, as long as we pay the bills, it’s hard to get anybody to rock the boat with you.)

Improving
1. Momentum is sustained through continuous improvement. Seems like everyone understands this in the marketplace but not in the world. There are 9 versions of Crest toothpaste. (It’s all about perception. We want our customers to understand we want their experience to be the very best possible.) Customers want to know you’re still working on things (new & improved).

(Personal note: **I don’t disagree w/ “new & improved” but somehow this must be balanced w/the tension of Jesus’ life and example.)

2. Continuous improvement requires systematic evaluation. This has to be built into the rhythm of your organization and it can’t just happen whenever or be anecdotal. (Your wife saying, “that was a great sermon honey,” isn’t systematic evaluation.)
3. Continuous improvement requires unfiltered evaluation.
(Can’t stand to listen to myself or watch myself. Maybe nobody else can either.) Is there a meeting when people get to evaluate the sermon? (That’s daring!)
4. Continuous improvement requires that nothing and nobody be off limits. No one is untouchable. If you’re aren’t evaluating areas where you have momentum, the clock of your success is ticking down. Everything has a shelf life and becomes old.
*Never forget, everything you do is being evaluated every week. You may not have a meeting, but it’s happening somewhere. So why not learn from it. NOT examining what’s under the rocks is bad leadership.

Application:
1. New personnel. Leaders can’t stand plateau.
2. New programming.
3. New season. (shut down so you can relaunch) – not manipulating, but leveraging reality.
They shut down the Sunday of/after Christmas so they can relaunch the first Sunday  in January. Forces folks to miss, they reconvene.
4. New series.
5. New Look.
6. New Venue.

1. Look for ways to upgrade your presentations. Restaurants do this: chicken, fish or beef, etc. It’s about presentation. Work on your presentation for kids, middle schoolers, etc. As a communicator, find out how to get better.
2. Visit other organizations. Find the company who is best at service and figure out how they do it. The church is the Guest Services business – you’re taking their kids for an hour.

Momentum stoppers:
1. Disengaged leader.
2. Overactive management (Management manages to sameness. Leaders lead toward chaos.) Leaders have to have chaos, but chaos needs structure, created by mgmt.
3.  Complacency
4. Complexity (not found in church plants)
5. Breach of trust

** Best way to kill a bad idea is to get everybody so excited about a new idea that they don’t even go to the funeral.

It’s about ministry.

There. I’ve said it out loud. Again.

For most of my life, I’ve had this sense that God “wanted to use me in a special way.” I’ve loved Him, His word and His people for as long as I can remember. But I could never fully embrace being in ministry, because it wasn’t allowed. I grew up in a church that didn’t affirm women in ministry, and I had no role models.

So I ministered in other ways. Meaningful ways I think.

When I was married to a minister, I served alongside him. When he left the professional ministry, we served in lay ministry together. Even after our divorce, I continued to find places to serve.

Throughout my life I’ve also viewed my work as a place of ministry. When I worked in banking, I had faith conversations with coworkers. In retail, those conversations included customers and coworkers. When I worked in an apartment community, God used me in the lives of residents and coworkers. (I don’t say that with a sense of pride, but to illustrate the people God wove into my life.)

Over the last ten years, I’ve been the most fulfilled when I could minister to others. I can’t tell you the number of times I prayed with folks in my office at the Chamber. Colleagues and business owners. Though the situations weren’t always positive, those times were exhilarating. Likewise, I’ve immensely enjoyed the consulting work I’ve done when I’ve had the freedom to express my faith.

But taking the leap from one thing to another is a bit scary. The wrestling has been hard. Saying it out loud even harder.

A couple of weeks ago, I was doing laundry in the laundry room. I often use that time to pray and worship. I’ve even printed out the lyrics to “Garments of Praise” and placed it on the wall in front of the ironing board.

There’s always laundry to do in a family with six people, which is good, because there’s always praying to do.

At that moment, I realized my next steps are about ministry. Not about consulting, or training or even about social media. But about ministry.

The wrinkles within me released. For years God had gently been placing me on the ironing board of life, spraying a little starch here, using a little steam there. Pressing harder in some places than others.

Finally, I said yes.

Peter was in the bomb-shelter-soon-to-be-man-cave/office/sanctuary, putting down new flooring. I stood in the doorway, and said it out loud for the first time.

“It’s about ministry.”

No explanation, no commentary. Not even any tears, which is pretty unusual for me.

I’m not sure what kind of response I expected, but it wasn’t what I got.

“Duh!”

My husband, working out his own calling on his hands and knees, affirmed me in ways he’ll never know. With one syllable. And he didn’t even use a real word.

Since then, God has confirmed that He’s calling Peter and me, and our family, to [lcf], a church plant on the campus of Lynchburg College. I’m pretty sure there’s more to the story, but for now, that’s what I can tell you.

I ask for your prayers as God continues to show me, show us, where the waters are stirring.

How about you?

Are you finding any clarity about the ways God is moving in your life? If so, I’d love to hear details.
How can I pray for you on your journey?

This morning my excitement grew as I read Equipping Female Leaders by Jo Saxton on the Catalyst blog. Jo does a great job of explaining her experience in a mixed gender Leadership Huddle led by Mike Breen.

Ironically, when I began praying about my upcoming huddle, I initially thought it would be comprised of women only. God had other plans. So next week, I’ll begin facilitating my first Huddle with three men, and two-four women (two confirmed so far, awaiting final confirmation on remaining two).

I’m looking forward to all that God has in store in my life and in the lives of outstanding leaders from Lynchburg to Indiana to Texas – and as far away as Hungary!

What about you?
Has God ever changed your plans from what you thought to what He thought?
How has God brought folks together in your life via social media?
What are you doing to grow in your journey as a Christ follower?
And how is God using you to lead others?

(Creative Commons photo on Flickr by Arne Hendriks.)

For the last six weeks, I’ve been one of six participants in a Leadership Huddle led by John Chandler of the The Spence Network. We’ve been processing life through the lens of “life shapes,” and based on the life of Jesus. The whole idea comes from the guys at 3D Ministries, out of Pawley’s Island, SC. (Watch the video at the 3D Ministries link above to learn more about the movement of God in the UK and beyond.)

Today in our conversation, John talked about being aware of the people that God brings into our midst and he said something that struck me,

“It’s like developing eye muscles.”

Too often, we see only what we’re looking for (like the basketball pass video), rather than seeing all that is happening in our very midst. Which, of course, has me thinking.

Am I aware of all that even part of what God is doing around me? And if not, what can I do to develop my spiritual eye muscles, so that I’m ready to respond when He presents me with opportunities?

Today, I’m praying that God will open our eyes to the things He has in store. Kind of reminds me of the verse,

“No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind can conceive what God has prepared for those who love Him.” 1 Corinthians 2:9

What are you doing to develop your eye muscles? Spiritual or literal?

The first, and easy answer is because for the last year plus, I’ve been working with WMUV and the Spence Network to put together a leadership group for women in ministry, and this is one of the events the Uptick group is attending. Actually, both the men’s and women’s Uptick groups will be together for this event, which is expected to draw hundreds of people (800 or so is the number that sticks out in my mind, but I have no idea if that is based in reality or just some random number pulled from the recesses of my brain) from throughout the United States and beyond.

Here are at least four other reasons I’m attending the Ecclesia 2010 National Gathering:

1. Nurture existing relationships. Over the last year, I’ve had the privilege to work with and meet some incredibly sharp people in Virginia Baptist life. I’m looking forward to reconnecting with those folks.

2. Learn something useful. My church is in a time of transition. Being with the best and brightest minds in missional churches today will surely give me at least one or two ideas that I can take home to share with my own church leadership. I’m sure they’ll be some business and social media implications as well.

3. Make great connections. I love meeting new people and seeing how I can connect those people with others who can help accomplish their goals. If you’re attending Ecclesia, be sure to look me up and say hi. (That reminds me. I must pack business more business cards.)

4. Do a little scouting. As I mentioned, our church is in a time of transition. I’ll be on the lookout for the names of potential ministers whose names I can pass along to our Pastor Search Committee.

Are you attending the Ecclesia 2010 National Gathering?
If so, tell me what you’re hoping to get out of the gathering. What focused sessions are on your radar screen?

Creative Commons photo by 917press on Flickr.

Yesterday I said yes.

Next month I’ll lead a seminar about using social media for the Christian Camp and Conference Center Association (CCA) Carolinas/Virginia Sectional Meeting. That’s a lot of words to say I’ll be helping people who are intentional about kingdom impact and who have the opportunity to invest in hundreds/thousands of lives over the course of time.

THAT excites me.

• I can’t pour into the lives of thousands of youth seeking a deeper faith (or a new faith) each summer. My time is too finite.
• I can’t provide lodging for hundreds of women’s retreats, offering fellowship and hope each spring and fall. My house is too small.
• I can’t connect groups seeking space to reflect and grow, with conference centers who are designed with that purpose in mind. My contacts aren’t that specific.
• I can’t equip ministers in five states to carry out their calling. My knowledge isn’t that broad.
• I can’t inspire lay people throughout the Virginias/Carolinas to live out their faith in ways that reach the world. My experiences are too limited.

But by focusing on what I can do – teach others how to use social media – I can make bigger footprints.

My own life has been shaped dramatically by my experiences at Christians camps and conference centers. These are people who make it happen, day in, day out. I’m looking forward to sharing how they can use social media to broaden their impact.

And in so doing, I’ll be broadening my own.

How might you need to shift your focus from can’t, to can? How do you align your actions with your goals and core values? How can you make the biggest impact with your finite resources?

As a side note, my ability to speak at this conference is actually a shared ministry. I’m thankful for Peter’s encouragement to follow my calling and his willingness to hold down the fort while I’m away.

Creative Commons photo Footprint in the Sand on Flickr.